SO this is my first official rant post! Yahhh be excited!! For this you are gonna need to know some key players, so as stated in an earlier post I am going to use colors as names to keep anonymity. This rant (and probably some other to come with how its going so far) has to do with my roommate Indigo and my other roommate Navy. Indigo, Navy, and I have been friends for about a year now, and originally thought living together would be the greatest thing ever, if you heard the advice never live with your friends, actually listen!!!! A couple months ago some shit went down with Indigo, and ever since then it has been constant turmoil with tons of backstabbing, rumors, and just an all around shit-fest. I know that I am not in the clear for some of it, but I had been trying very hard to work it out. And I thought that it was all over this month as we started to get back into the swing of things. I made a resolution to not let it get that bad ever again, and thus have been extra considerate and in my opinion all around nice. While it has sucked it did bring me and Navy closer together, and we have patched everything up. Navy and Indigo have basically given up on each other, to the point where they can go a couple days without even talking to each other, I should probably mention that our living quarters are pretty tight. I thought Indigo and me, were making great progress though and might be able to actually get back to how it used to be. BUT THEN THIS WEEKEND CAME…
So it is Friday night, I have had a LONG day and am exhausted, I have to wake up at 6:30 am the next morning (which is an almost impossible feat for a college student). Now its get to be 12o’clock. So I turn to my roommates and go, “hey guys I’m gonna go to bed pretty soon”. I then proceed to get ready for bed, when I come back from the bathroom, I ask if they mind if I turn the light off. I switch it off, and say “well I’m going to bed” at which Indigo responds “oh okay, well I am going to Skype with my friend”. I of course assume Indigo is just telling me this just in passing, and that Indigo would go to the lounge and Skype so I could sleep. I respond “Oh okay nice! well I’m sleeping”. THEN I GET THE RESPONSE… “okay, I will talk quietly then”.
I’M SORRY WHATTT??? HOW IS THAT IN ANYWAY A GOOD IDEA? Why wouldn’t you just walk the 15 feet to the lounge where you can talk as loud as you want??? But whatever. I should have realized then, what I was getting myself into. I replied “oh okay” of course, trusting that we all had a sense of respect for one another. After all, last year both Indigo and Navy had roommates that skyped loudly into the late hours of the night keeping them up, and we had all talked about how annoying it was and how that would never be us. But that was before the debacle of a couple months ago. So with hopes of respect I get comfy in bed.
The skype comes through, and then cackling and loud talking crashes through my momentarily peaceful state. I sit up to try to get eye contact with Indigo and send the warning signal to quiet it down. Of course head phones are in and eyes are fixed on the screen. I hope that maybe it will get better and Indigo will remember the promise to be quiet and that I had said twice already how it was important for me to go to bed, and my intention to do so. The assumption that the courtesy for each other would follow, was slowly dwindling away now. About 30min later, I get up to go to the bathroom and talk to Indigo when I get back. I see Indigo in the bathroom and once again state that I am trying to sleep. The response is an “okay” and I finally thought an understanding is reached! I walk back into the room triumphantly only to find the skype still on the laptop, I wave to Indigo friend who I meet before, and explain that I am going to sleep, thinking making this clear to both parties, as well as Navy who has been watching this all unfold, will make it easier for the skype to either end or be moved. I crawl back in bed, for another peaceful 5 minutes.
Indigo comes back in and instantly starts chatting as well as turning on the fucking(excuse my french) light, now Indigo isn’t the quietest talker and even less when the communication is over technology with a best bud. Instantly the headphones are back in, and the conversation begins. The friend must have kept saying she was tired (huh I wonder why cuz it is now almost 1am) and Indigo continues to reply that it was funny because the nap taken for 3 hours was super energizing.
AT THIS POINT I HAVE TOLD INDIGO (count them) 3 times of my intentions to go to bed, and about my early morning. I am not the one to want to tell others how to live their lives, especially Indigo who has a history of taking things VERY personally and creating vendettas against people for stupid things. I prefer to conform to the Socratic method of leading people to answers rather then telling them straigh up what to do. AND I figured my nicely telling that I was going to bed would lead her to the following conclusions:
1. ART(thats me in case you forgot) wants to go to bed.
2. Bed is where one sleeps.
3. Sleep is usually a night time event.
4. Night is usually dark and moderately quietly.
SO WAIT! IF ART WANTS TO SLEEP MAYBE I SHOULD MAKE THE ROOM DARK AND QUIET!
And then I would proceed to give Indigo a Noble Fucking Prize, 1 Million Dollars, enough chocolate to feed a small country and a personally clown. BECAUSE THAT IS HOW PROUD I WOULD HAVE BEEN OF INDIGO IF THE THOUGHT OF PUTTING SOMEONE ELSE FIRST WAS ONE HAD!
but of course,
SO realizing that my chance to communicate with Indigo was slim to none, since the headphones were now pushed firmly into the ear canal, and also not wanting to get out of my bed that is a good 4 feet off the ground (I have a lofted bed), I start to except my fate and reach for my trusty head phones that I keep next to my bed, and blast some angsty music. This is the song I have personally dedicated to Indigo currently. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iGabXpdJhz0
I start to pray for it to end soon, (im not religious either so this was big). I still hear Indigo howling over my blasting music, and as it continues I get more and more upset. I feel more and more disrespected, unappreciated, and even worthless. I begin to realize that the progress I thought we were making and all the hard work I had been putting in to be nice and fix things was useless. You can’t be friends with someone who doesn’t want to be. I go into a dark place, as I start questioning what I am even doing here at college, I am sure as hell not being happy, not being myself because of it, not producing the best work because I am so stressed from dealing with everything, yada-yada.
Its now 2:30. I have to wake up in 4 hours, SOLID. Navy texts me, “Is this pissing me off as much as you. Indigo is being beyond disrespectful, I’m going the fuck to bed and I’m not gonna be as nice as you are. I told you being nice doesn’t work with Indigo.” Navy calls out to Indigo. Nothing… walks over to the still on lights. Turns them off. Indigo instantly turns around, ripping off the ear phones angrily, “WHATTTT!”
Navy:”I AM GOING TO BED, THAT MEANS LIGHTS OFF, NO NOISE. ART HAS BEEN TRYING TO SLEEP FOR THE PAST 3 HOURS WHICH WAS EXPRESSED TO YOU. SO I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU DO BUT IT NEEDS TO BE QUIET”
Indigo(pissed):”You could have just told me. I HAVE A NAME YOU KNOW?!”
At which point I could feel Navy and myself collective mentally picture recreating Sherlock’s falling seen with Indigo cast as Sherlock, and no clever fakery.
Now I admit maybe I am over reacting, and if this were a one time thing it would have been fine, but the fact that shit like this has been going on for the past 4 months is beyond ridiculous to me. I did not go to college to become someone parent and tell them when bed time was, to be considerate of others and watch their manners. YOU ARE SUPPOSE TO LEARN THAT STUFF IN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL!
BUT HEY, I ended up waking up at 6:30 as planed (ok well 6:45) and groggily made it through my full day, only slightly upset at the world. Life goes on, and that is what this blog is all about, talking about the struggles that while in the moment seem awful, but in life are hopefully just little bumps in the road!
And as always remember to smile at a stranger, thank a plant, and eat something covered in cheese (or just a potato if your lactose intolerant)! Have a nice day!
p.s. if anyone is actually reading this, let me know what you think of the pictures and the length. I think it might be a little too long!